Part 1: The Duties of Women | Principles Of Marriage & Family Ethics | santoriniinfo.info
Rasulullah said: "Accept my goodly advice with regard to women .. The of relationship between husband and wife and the behaviours and. Husband-Wife relationship “And among His Signs is this that He created for you wives (spouses) from It would have been very difficult to achieve compatibility. Allah described marriage very differently in the Holy Quran: '. (where is this hadith found) Show your wife that you appreciate her. It is better to deal with problems early and honestly than to let them pile up until an explosion occurs.
As much as marriage can fall into a routine, it is important that as a couple you two retain the identity of man and wife. Play games, eat out at your favourite restaurants, and get the heart rate up with some fun adrenaline -filled sport. Create a buzz that you will remember and talk about for years to come.
Part 1: The Duties of Women
You have rights over your women and your women also have rights over you. Their rights over you are that you provide food and clothing for them in good faith. Your rights over them are that they do not allow and nor do they give permission, for people to trespass into your house whose presence you dislike. A man must take the helm as a provider, but equally, a woman needs to close ranks and protect the home from any presence that may threaten it.
It is through this synergy and language of give and take that strong marriage is built upon. Love and a successful marriage are defined by kindness and acts of giving between a husband and wife in Islam.
At times, we give in kind, such as giving our love, time, effort, energy, imagination and compassion and that is enough. However, there are other times when a well-timed present makes a person feel that much more special. Get him or her, their favourite attar or book they would like to read. Contrary to what it may seem like, these are not necessarily material expressions of love. What it does convey, is that you took the time to observe and listen to your partners needs and found ways to meet them, which is in itself an ideal way to endear yourself to your partner.
Consider taking the time to discuss feelings and emotions. Both men and women are different in the ways in which they feel and interpret behaviour. Women are often known for being the more vocal sort, needing to communicate with and connect to the people who inhabit their world. On the other hand, men may be the strong silent type, who internalise their feelings rather than expressing them. While there are exceptions to every rule, there has to be a safe space between couples that allow for those feelings to surface.
Make sure conversations are constructive, rather than destructive. Speak from a place of building rather than breaking down.
Take responsibility for the energy you bring to the table Narrated AbuHurayrah: When the Prophet peace be upon him congratulated a man on his marriage, he said: May Allah bless for you, and may He bless on you, and combine both of you in good works. Sunan of Abu Dawood — Book 11 Hadith From this narration of hadith, it is evident that each partner needs to take responsibility for the attitude and the actions that they bring to the table in married life.
They say that in this life, your experience is based exactly on what you give. If this is the case, what type of energy are you bringing to the table? When it comes to marriage our approach needs to be equally as awakened and careful.
A note to every Muslim husband and wife: No matter what challenges a marriage may be faced with if you change from the sour, frustrated, heavy attitude to a more pleasant demeanour it makes a world of difference to the general view of the marriage. Kindness, care and consideration to the marriage will all amount to a healthy dose of energy towards building a better bond.
For just one evening in the week, skip gym and get home a little earlier to your wife. Ladies, meet your husband in the middle of a work day for a lunch date. Most importantly speak to your spouse in the quiet times about acts of spontaneity that would add value to their lives. When you are tired from the rigours of daily living and feel overwhelmed by the number of commitments on your plate, just remember that all it takes is one of you to do something exciting and kind to start a positive chain reaction.
Marriage is the ultimate act of team work. One of the best examples of this is seen through Prophet Muhammad sall Allahu alaihe wa sallam and Sayyidah Khadijah R. Awho were in fact the ultimate team. With this in mind, protect your partner, speak positivity into their life. Remember that you are not just a marital partner, but the other half of a winning team.
Inshallah, your marriage is a growing asset and foundation upon which you will raise wonderful children and fulfil the goals of half of your deen. Bearing this in mind, you owe it yourself and your marriage to fuel your mind with positives and how you do this is by reinforcing the good times.
It is in this manner that you give your marriage a firm foundation to stand upon. And when they have purified themselves, then come to them as Allah has commanded you. Truly Allah loves those who turn unto Him, and loves those who have a care for cleanness. Your women are a Harth for you, so come to your Harth however you like.
Send good ahead for yourselves and have fear of Allah. Know that you are going to meet Him, and give good news to the believers. This verse says nothing of other physical contact, so the idea that women should be apart or be deprived of any physical contact during the menstrual period has no basis.
If we use this meaning, then it would be understood as found with modification in Lane's Lexicon as: This meaning of the word i. The traditional meaning took a very plain direct meaning from a farming context, namely, you sow seed in your wife and you get a baby in return. While this can be a shade of the meaning, it should not be the only meaning for this word in this verse. The word however has also more general meaning reflected by: In the context of crops, you till the land and sow the seed and you get the recompense when something grows.
The crop context is likely the original context for the word harth; however the word is used in other contexts by abstracting the process of planting seed and benefiting from what grows. In the nature of Arabic words in the language, the various shades of meaning of a word are typically linked by a common foundation.
The Husband wife relationship in Islam
And so from this foundation you have general meanings coming like recompense, reward, etc. That is, something in which you expend effort and from which you derive a reward or recompense. And whoever desires the recompense harth of this world - We give him thereof, but there is not for him in the Hereafter any share. This is clearly not narrowly referring to farmers or the like. We have here a statement from Allah saying that for those who put in the effort for the hereafter, they will get the recompense in the hereafter and for those who put the effort for this life; they will get their reward in this life.
So within the context of a wife, we should take the general meaning in all its applications as relevant. Your wife is the one that you protect and love, the one you support and guide. And in return for your effort, she is the one who obeys and loves you, the one that gives you affection and tranquillity, the one that guards you honour etc. The wife should be receptive to her husband and his needs, as Allah has revealed that the husband comes to his wife as he pleases.
As to those women on whose part ye fear disloyalty and ill-conduct nushuzadmonish them firstNextrefuse to share their beds, And last separate from them; but if they obey you, seek not against them Means of annoyance: For Allah is Most High, great above you all.
This is the decree of Allah that must be established if at all possible. It is not for men, women or society at large to dictate otherwise.
It makes sense that Allah would specify the dynamics between husband and wife that fulfil this verse and further, that Allah would design the man and the woman to be fulfilled by this dynamic. A man should not only accept this arrangement, he must embody it as best he can so that his wife appreciates and submits to the arrangement.
He should to seek to be a worthy leader and caretaker for his wife, to organise his finances and circumstances as best he can to fulfil the dynamic defined by Allah. When he is respected and obeyed in his role and when he is loved and cared for because of his role.
A woman will be most content when she is protected and cared for, when she respects and submits to the authority of her husband and can give her love and devotion in this context.
In short, for the man that embodies the strength and leadership of the correct Muslim man, a woman will automatically respect and submit by her nature. A woman should be devoutly obedient to her husband, in that she should obey him in matters that are not expressly forbidden by Allah. A lazy, immature husband that neglects his role does not deserve the obedience of his wife. It should be noted that some have stated that the obedience mentioned in this verse the first time it is mentioned is for Allah.
For this reason, the obedience is to the husband here and not in relation to Allah. Obedience of the wife is critical part of the husband and wife relationship.
The role of the husband is to protect and guide his wife, to look out for her affairs. To complete this task properly and to embody the role, he must have both authority over and obedience from his wife. The analogy here is if you work in a company and you have someone under your management, you must have the authority to order this person to do tasks otherwise the company will not work harmoniously.